Posted in Best things in life are free, Cleaning, Family

Are we expecting to much of our self’s of mum’s  (and dads) 

Reading through a post on Facebook, regarding how much housework we should be doing as a SAHM or SAHD  (for those who don’t know they mean stay at home mummy or dad) and are your houses always untidy.

God yes! There are real mums and dads who’s houses aren’t unclean but are messy with toys, books and general clutter of children. 

I am currently sitting in my living room with coco pops under the table  (the Dyson is charging but also hoping the cats may take a liking to them) toys all over the floor and the covers from the sofa are still in the putting away/back on pile and they have been there since last week, thank goodness for throws and pillows to cover the sofa… 

Anyway are we expecting to much of our self’s? Should I still have coco pops on the floor, should I have got the heavy hoover out and hoovered up 2 minutes before we had to leave for school and run the risk of Bear being late? 

I’d rather leave the coco pops on the floor for a extra ten minutes than Bear being late for school. 

I remember growing up the house was always tidy and clean, nothing was out of place, the toys lived in the cupboard under the stairs and that’s where they went when I finished with them. The washing machine was always on and the bedding was changed weekly and dinner was always dished up dead on 5.30. 

Obviously I didn’t get the clean and tidy bit from my mum, I hate cleaning! 

Anyway enough of my ramblings here are some tips to help you. 

  1. Rota the housework everything doesn’t need to be done daily! 
  2. Plan a meal rota (I’ve just started but so far it’s a life saver!)
  3. If your child is poorly sit and cuddle, housework can wait a poorly child on the other hand can’t.
  4. Deligate housework, if and your partner work (Even if one of you is full time) help each other don’t leave everything to one person being a SAHM/SAHD is actually harder than it looks! 
  5. Don’t critizes your partner or wife/husband if the place is untidy when you get home from work, the main important thing is the children are safe and happy.
  6. Always remember the children aren’t always going to be living at home one day you will have the house all to yourself and wish it was cluttered with toys again.

So you get the gist you don’t have to be supermum, superdad or superhuman, the house doesn’t need to be spotless and tidy 24/7 it’s okay to leave the dishes in the sink over night, it’s okay to not do the washing every day or change the bedding a few days later than you would do normally! 

Breath, relax and enjoy the children whilst they are young. I know a few people may disagree to this but remember everyone is different do what’s best for you. 

By the way my oven needs a clean and I still need to hoover ek! 

3 Little Buttons

Posted in Best things in life are free

Today I got thinking…. 

How much one to one time do I actually spend with each child… obviously I spend a lot more time with Bell than I do with  Bear as his now in full time education. But now Bell is getting to be a less of a a mummys girl (don’t it’s sad times) and more of I will stay with daddy without the emotional tears and tantrums which used to come with it… I have promised myself I will spend some one to one time with Bear. 

Even if it’s just to Tesco or a quick drive to collect petrol, as we all know money can be tight some times,  those 5 to 10 minutes can actually improve a child’s behaviour. 

Why? 

Because they aren’t trying to fight for attention with other siblings or your husband/partner, who could be their dad or their step parent. 

One to one time is actually beneficial  for both a adult and of course more importantly the child. 

With 16 years of child care behind me I have noticed the following of why a child could play up. I am obviously not a expert in child behaviour.

But here it goes….

  1. Negative speech towards a child,if your always given negative commnets to a child he or she may or will play on those comments as they will feel that they can’t do nothing better.
  2. You work part-time but your always putting your child in clubs, I know how annoying children can be. But the importance of spending time with a child and helping and taking time out for your child should come first!
  3. Always on your phone, okay even I am guilty of this put the phone down for 10 minutes and have a conversation with your child it’s not hard seriously ask how their day has been, who they played with simple things will make sure your child will feel they are valued
  4. Who always picks up? Yes this is tricky as many parents work long hours now a days but if your at home and it’s always your wife picking up from school but she works from home and your at home with the youngest swap roles, let dad pick up and have a conversation. Obviously if you can, it will make the world of good
  5.  Limit Ipad time, I swear this is the route of all evil, this is why children play up, this is why the art of conversation is dying out. You would be surprised at how many children get in from school and sit glued to the Ipad until dinner is ready!
  6. Last but not least take a interest in your child’s homework, even the most brightest child may struggle, if you don’t pay attention to their homework they will show less attention in school and play up.

So they are my 6 main things I have picked up on, obviously in a  perfect world we would be there 24/7, UK schools would start teaching at the age of 7 and homewoork would be non existent.

My main point is take time even if it’s 5 or 10 minutes (longer if possible!) With your child one to one. Even if you have to lock the bathroom door and sit on the loo for a quick chat do it!

Posted in Best things in life are free, Explore the world, Family, Kent Family, Local life, parent

The Coffee Shop

I’m sitting in the coffee shop around the corner from my place, one day it’s really quiete and the next is so busy.

I am not complaining one bit, the coffee shop is a little independent shop, with fabulous staff and a lovely atmosphere.

Today it’s busy, the coffee shop is hosting a Macmillian coffee morning and there are a few groups of people, 6 ladies who are chatting loudly who keep looking around and apologising  almost every five minutes for being loud, the keep fit ladies who are sitting out the front, two gentlemen who are celebrating a birthday and three ladies who always seem to be in here having a chat but mostly listing into other people’s conversations. 

This is why I love the coffee shop there is always a mix of people, you hardly ever see the same people sitting in. 

The cakes are amazing here they are mouthwatering. They don’t bake them themselves but they have a lady who bakes and brings them in. 

There is a wide selection of hot drinks, unfortunately I do not drink hot drinks, but hubs does so he has plenty of choice.

There are plenty of choices for sandwiches, wraps and paninies. Either hot or cold. 

The milkshakes!!!! If I had the money I would have one everyday, they have fresh fruit, chocolate bars and biscuits to choose from, and if they don’t have what you fancy take it with you as they offer a discount, I only found out about this the other day when they ran out of my favourite sweets! 

Now here’s the most important things you need to know, the staff are brilliant, they go above and beyond for you, like today it was a gentleman’s birthday who seems to go in quite a bit and they had a happy birthday banner up for him.

No request is too big or too small for the staff here.

The only down side is the coffee shop is small and if there are a few buggies it does get very tight, but I’ve never had a problem with this. 

So enjoy! 

Posted in Best things in life are free, Family, Kent Family, Life

A brief reminder 

Dear Bear and Beany

I came across this post Nobody Saw You this morning, I admit it made me cry. Why? Not in a bad way, but in a good way. 

I’ll explain, the last few months I always feel like I am alone, I know I’m not alone I have a few amazing friends, family and of course the Hubs and the children. But motherhood can be such a lonely world, Wether or not you are a such butterfly or you shine away, motherhood can actually be  a very lonely place, we all share our experiences with others, but nobody knows what goes on behind closed doors. I’ve had a hell of a time with Bear recently, no matter what I do or say he just screams and crys after school, I really do not think waking up at 5am is really helping but it’s so hard to break the code of getting him to sleep until 6am! Bell isn’t helping the matter either, she is now going through the phase of she wants a comforter but she really doesn’t actually want it, so the milk cup is thrown out of the bed about 10 times before she even considers going to sleep. 

It also doesn’t help that autumn is officially here the nights are getting colder and longer, I am back to work and I hate October with a passion. Why? In 15 days would mark the anniversary of my mums death to Cancer. Did I tell you cancer sucks? 

The upside to the last few months are I’ve found friends who want to know me, who are worried about me, who know this isn’t like me hiding away. I’ve joined The PTA as chair (this could be fun!), I’m also joining in with more class parent social events, I’m hunting for a new group to take Bell to, as I think she is getting bored of the local ones, even though they are amazing!  Bear is getting in to his reading and doing really well  in year 1 so far and Bell adores Pre-school.

My message really is about everyone may always have a smile on their faces, be a social butterfly and seem to know everyone and anyone, but in reality that person is, or could be the most loneliest person in the world or they may feel like the most loneliest person in the world even though they aren’t. 

Posted in Best things in life are free, Blog, Family, family fun

Family fun time! 

Tammymum

What we do for our family fun times? 

I thought I would do a quick bullet point and picture post of a few things we love doing… 

We love the outdoors and exploring different places.

We also love watching the change of seasons

We love bathtime! Who knew adding food colouring could be so much fun. Why not have a peek at my Fun Bath Time Ideas Post for more ideas.

We love dressing up and being crafty! 


We love playing with our Cats Willow and Daisy 

There are so many more fun things we love doing together as a family, far too many to mention! 
What do you love doing as a family? 

Why not #familyfun on twitter and join in with the fun! I am also on Instagram

Posted in Best things in life are free, clothing, essentials, Family, Kent Family, Life, life skills, pbloggeruk

Why I still choose what Bear and Bell wear…

I think I have a OCD in dressing my children, I can not stand mix match Pjs or clothes which don’t go together.

It makes me feel uneasy.

I don’t know why, it just does! I know I should encourage independence in encouraging them choosing their own clothes but I can’t do it… not just yet.

I am very lucky that Bear is very laid back and seems to wear what I lay out. Bell too most days. I do give them choices don’t get me wrong. They can choose out of two or three outfits. Usually they mix and match so I make sure that they all go together in some way or another.

Bell is getting very independent and is a proper girlie girl and has  mind of her own when she dresses herself!

Luckily she seems to make sure the clothes goes together, unlike Bear.

When Hubs gets the children ready for bed he seems to think mix match PJS are okay to wear… (they are but just not in our house) I have been  known to wake the children up and redress them!

I sort of keep their clothes simple and almost 60%of their clothes go with everything eles they have.

Underwear etc for some reason do not need to match! Maybe because I can’t see it and we have done the whole toilet training where they ended up with mix match vest and pants by 10am…

I am dreading the time when Bell and Bear choose their own clothes and they don’t match!

Posted in Airport, Best things in life are free, Dinosaurs, Explore the culture, Explore the world, Family, holidays, Life, love, pbloggeruk

Lanazorte 2013

**back to the past**

We went to Lanazorte when Bear was little and I was pregnant with Bell. 

It was Bears first trio to the airport and he loved it he was unsure of going through the security machine but do you blame him it must be scary for a child. He choose a magazine, some sweets and of course a drink for the plane.

The flight was great, we had  early morning flight, we packed small toys from the pound shop and wrapped in tissue paper, so he could open up during the flight, it worked really well. We also took sone of our own snacks too. He played, ate and had a sleep! 

We stayed in a hotel  (baby brain has made me forget the name!) Which was flintstone themed. Unfortunately the room wasn’t but that didn’t bother me at all. 

There was little dinosaurs to sit on and ride on. 

The little play park was good too but more for a 3 year old plus child. Bear enjoyed it Though!!!

The hotel was clean and the food was okay. The children’s pool was just a round pool no slide but Bear was very happy with that.

We visited the local zoo which had a play park, water park and lots of lovely animals which had so much space to roam around and it was so clean, and it was reasonable priced too!

Bear loved the beach he was very happy toddling up and down on the sand building sand castles and padding in the sea! 

The weather was amazing, and I really do not understand why people call Lanazorte, lanzorgote at all! 

Posted in Best things in life are free, creativity, Family, Kent Family, Life, New Blogger, parent, parent blogger, pbloggeruk

How to get the best of having your own time….

When  you become a parent Wether your a mum or dad. It really is important to have time together or even separate. 

Being a full time mum or dad (let’s face it ladies there are a few fantastic daddies who are stay at home dad’s!) We need our down time! 

Since Bear was born in was very much trying to get him into a 7pm-7am night time routine. It did work for a while. But then he got to the terrible sleeping phase but more on that in the future. 

Anyway to create some me time or more importantly how to get some “Me” time.

Here are my top tips for getting some me time.

1- let a relative have them over night… (my cousin is  gem, she has Bear every few months now, for a night so we just have Bell) 

2- Go to a keep fit class, yep this is one time I actually get where I am not having knocks on the bathroom door asking how long I will be as Bear or Bell wants me and not Daddy…

3- Find a good book and lock yourself in the bathroom with some candles and a glass of wine or if you don’t drink some orange juice. 

4- Take up a hobby. I am really into Knitting, but more on that later. 

5- Meet friends for a Meal or go to the cinema. Come on who doesn’t want to sit child free in the cinema and not share your sweets and popcorn?

I only really have 5 chill outs for me time what are yours? 

Posted in Adventure, Beach, Best things in life are free, Explore the culture, Explore the world, Family, Kent Family, New Blogger, parent, parent blogger, pbloggeruk, summer, summer holidays, Travel tips with children

Routines have gone out the ….

Routines have gone out the window at the moment!

You Know when its school holidays everything becomes a bit more relaxed, calmer and the routine seems to go out of the window.

The children seem to want feeding every 10 minutes, they want to do something different every 20 minutes, toys are usually scattered all over the place and your walking on Lego, like its hot coal. They usually end up arguing with each other right when your preparing a snack or drink for them and then they moan that they are having to wait for what they asked for, with you replaying calmly to wait one minute as your are busy with their sibling.

The routine of the School term is usually a mad rush to get out the door so your on time for the lining up in the playground… (we live 5 minutes walk from the school). The homework they have has to be completed by a certain day and handed in, reading is done every night. Toddler groups are on and its finding the best one for your child as some get too packed, or their isn’t enough places to park so you frantically need to find another option or hope when you drive round again there is a space. Then its getting back for lunch and maybe a nap before heading of to the school pick up.

School  holidays are usually lazying around in our PJ’S until around 9/10 am then actually starting to figure out what to actually do during the day with the children which wont cost the earth, but also checking which places don’t charge for under 3’s whilst we are at it!

The bedtime routine is also a bit hit and miss, We are usually aiming for bed by 8pm and dinner around 6 half 6.

Then there is the adding job of Blogging, writing and ensuring there is a post almost everyday, along with updating Instagram, Twitter, Path and Flickr.

Then there is work to also add, two days 7am-5pm, and preparing packed lunch and taking enough snacks/activities to do to kill the boredom they may start to get around 2/3pm…

And hopefully the rest of the summer will end up staying away from accident and emergency…

Also to add to my list is packing for a week away… this packing light seems not to be working, Maybe I am being a bit OCD with clothes after all Bell is still having the odd number 2 accidents and Bear usually drops some ice cream down his top.

So today’s plan is PJ’s, DVD and popcorn day…..

Posted in Best things in life are free, Cats, Family, Kent Family, New Blogger, parent blogger, pbloggeruk, Pets

Pets and Children

When I was Pregnant with Bear, one of my relatives mentioned that I should re-home of my two cats, Patch and Smudge. They were almost 16 years old and had already gone through two house moves with me and they didn’t cope very well.

They were my mums cats so I was very amendment that they would not be going.

When Bear was born Patch wasn’t that interested and ran into the bedroom for peace and quite when Bear cried. He was more interested once Bear was more mobile and would chase the ball when he rolled it.

Smudge however was the most affectionate cat ever to Bear. When Bear cried smudge would sit either outside our bedroom door at night and meow or if I was in the Kitchen he would meow and walk around my legs and sometimes it would be a minute or two before Bear actually woke up.

When Bear was 8 months we were asked to foster a rescue kitten as the animal shelters were full over Christmas (please think before you buy!) and she is still here today.

When Bell was born we only had Patch, we did have Daisy too, Daisy wasn’t fussed but Patch turned into Smudge and was really good with her.

We now have Daisy (5) and Willow (1)  and they are both really good with the children. They do occasionally try and nip but it is usually when they are over excited and lose track of who they are playing with!